A letter to Father (name ommited)

Dear Father (name omitted),

Forgive me for being so blunt, but get your act together!
You've been at our parish for nearly a year, and a priest for much longer than that, you shouldn't be forgetting to restock the hosts before mass.

At least once a month, you have to send one of the Eucharistic ministers back to the sacristy to get the ciboriums and to get more hosts. Come on! How hard is it to remember to do this? You have to do it at least once a day!!! Write yourself a note and post it in the sacristy!

Also, do you need a refresher course on baptisms? We've had them each of the past few Sundays and you never remind the congregation when they are supposed to respond and you often seem to get lost while saying the prayers.

Your rambling, scatterbrained ways make it very frustrating as a parishioner. You are a nice enough guy, but when you can't even manage to spit out the rules for fasting and abstaining from meat during Lent, it makes me question your vocational training.

So get your act together! And you might just win over the congregation!